Coffee and a bran muffin ain't working?

It's a new week. A new season. And a new job. That's right, started a new freelance job today. As you know, I can't state company names, but it's another big well-known agency. One that I know produces quality and creative work.

I was excited this morning to be starting out at a new place. Excited for new people, new clients, new projects… then I got my first assignment. I will be writing about medication for chronic constipation and IBS.

I kid you not.

You can call it fancy names like “slow moving digestion” and “infrequent bowel movements,” and I recognize that New York's ad industry is fueled by many big pharmaceutical companies, but let's get down to the point here - I'm writing about poop. Or, more specifically lack thereof.

Ya know, I'm trying not to be picky. I know I'm new to New York industry and only have a few years copywriting experience. I'm happy with what I can get. And I like this new office - I do.

Let's discuss the pros and cons…

Pro: The agency's in a great location, near lots of cool stuff and not nearly as crowded as midtown.
Con: I have to use words like “bloating” and “straining” in the brochure I'm writing.
Pro: My office has a huge window with a beautiful view of the city.
Con: The phrase “hard or lumpy stools” will most likely appear in my copy, possible multiple times.
Pro: The building has a very cool interior design - open, modern, spacious.
Con: I have to not only type, but actually visualize the concept of rectal bleeding.
Pro: The salary is ideal.
Con: I am forced to inform people that they should cease taking the medication if they get so much diarrhea that they get light-headed and faint!

So much diarrhea that they get light-headed and faint?!? Ugh, I think I need another vacation.