Still writing about constipation

It's ironic, because just this weekend, I was watching TV at home with Claire and we were laughing at some terrible commercial for Pepto-Bismol. We watched in horror as giant super heroes grabbed their stomachs and butt cheeks in pain while cheery voiceover sang the catchy "Heartburn, indigestion, diarrhea" jingle in the background. I thought to myself, "Thank GOD I don't have to write crap like that."

And I still don't. For what I'm writing about is the opposite of diarrhea. Constipation is sooo much cooler. If diarrhea were to ask constipation to go junior prom together, constipation would totally say no, because constipation is, like, so out of diarrhea's league.

I have to keep laughing at this assignment because if I don't, I will cry. However, I should count my blessings. I just found out that another medication this agency writes for is a treatment for genital herpes. I’m one lucky gal to be stuck with chronic constipation. Wait, that came out wrong.