You’d think it would be a pound or two at least.

Have you ever thought of weighing yourself previous to voiding your bowels, and then weighing yourself again after? C’mon, it sounds like a gross thought, but don't tell me it's never crossed your mind.

I tried it a few times as a kid. It was during my experimental phase of “What happens when I freeze this can of Coke?” and “Does this lotion taste as good as it smells?”

Disappointingly, the difference in weight was negligible. The freezer experiment resulted in an angry mother and hours of cleanup. And the lotion? No, it did NOT taste like vanilla and jasmine. It tasted like evil.